Sigh. This Won't help At All.

Father Anonymous is a kindly little pot-bellied fellow, with weak nerves and a timid demeanor. You can prove this by looking at the extremely realistic portrait on the sidebar.

As the presidential election approaches, he finds that those weak nerves have entered a state of constant agitation.  After a day of television, radio, newspapers, internet and conversation, he slams the door behind himself, sags backward and trembles uncontrollably, like a little bunny harried across the field by a pack of any hounds.  Oh, it's very sad.

And yet, like those morons ahead of you when they pass a highway accident, he simply cannot look away.  Instead, he rubbernecks.

And this won't help:  Pollster.com, linked above, with its pages and pages of aggregated poll results, reduced to brutally simple charts.  You can count electoral votes like a CNN talking head, look at Texas and weep, or at Florida and feel the sweat on your brow.  (Oh, and we pause here to offer a fraternal blessing to the Rev. Mother You-Know-Who, fighting the good fight for Missouri's eleven hotly contested electoral votes).

It's fun.  It's fascinating.  And afterward, you need a scotch chased with Librium.