Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Heather Locklear is Not Charlie Sheen

Even though they were both on Spin City.

Ms Locklear was picked up for DUI the other day, and had her good name (as well as a surprisingly respectable mug shot) thrown about in the tabs.  Well, just for the record:  She was framed. 

The police didn't hold her, for the good reason that her BC was well below the legal limit.  Turns out the whole thing was a set up, by a former employee of US magazine, who watched her leave a store, then made a 911 call to report her before her car was even moving, and then called a paparazzi to cash in.  Sleaze.

The Montauk Monster was too good for this sick, sad world, which is why he has surely returned to the depths, his absence a reminder of our wretchedness.

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